Prepare for your Marriage, not just your wedding

Luke 14:28-30
Luke 14:28-30 KJV
For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it ? [29] Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it , all that behold it begin to mock him, [30] Saying, This man began to build, and was not able to finish.

Wedding is a one day event, but marriage is a lifetime journey. But sadly, many people prepare exorbitantly for the ceremony forgetting that after the party, it’ll remain just the couple to live their life. It is what they carry in them that will carry them through the journey of marriage, it is the resources in them that will determine if the marriage will work or not.

Do not be carried away with celebration and forget the journey ahead, it is risky for you as a couple and your children yet unborn. Many people organise big wedding but you’ll realize after a few months or years, the wedding crashes, many factors can lead to this; our reference scripture Luke 14:28-30 emphasizes on counting the cost before embarking on a project or journey to ensure you have all it takes to make it a success. While preparing for wedding also get yourself equipped for marriage. Infact this should have began many years before talking about wedding.

Let’s consider the ten ten virgins Matthew 25:1-10
We can liken them to people preparing for wedding, only five made themselves ready for the journey ahead by getting extra oil for a refill because they had the future in view, they knew the oil in the lamp will not be enough for the length of the journey, but the other five only carried enough to give them light for the present.

This is the case with most couples preparing for wedding, they have enough to make the ceremony a success, more than enough rice, drinks, decorations, clothings etc but a little knowledge about marriage.

So, how can you as an individual prepare for marriage?

1. Ask questions: Asking questions doesn’t make you inferior, you’re only adding to your knowledge. More importantly, do not ask questions from just anyone, there are people who have gone ahead and are successful, these are the people to meet, they will guide you on what marriage entails and what you need to do to be successful in yours.

2. Read books: there are many books on marriage, walk into a bookshop and get books written by trustworthy men of God, learn from their experiences and avoid mistakes.

3. Observe successful homes and see how things are done: your pastor and his wife, men of God from other churches, and other people around who have succeeded in marriage over the years can be good example of homes for you to take time and observe how they live that makes their union remain strong.

4. Pray to God: He has the final say, and he is the one who can guide you without errors, he knows who you are to marry, mind you, if you marry the wrong person, that marriage is already a disaster waiting to happen. So pray to God to choose for you, then ask him to teach you how to run the home. God’s wisdom supercedes that of man.

5. Also get enlightened on how to raise godly children: children adds colour to the home, so you need to nurture them in the way of the Lord, else they will bring sorrow to the home. They need to be taught from childhood as it is easier to teach a child than to teach an adult. When they’re young is the best time to equip them.

6. Get a source of income or sources of income: you need money to sustain your home, you will eat, your spouse will eat and the children will also eat, there are many other expenses that comes with marriage and you will need money for that.

7. Work on your character: your character can build or destroy your marriage, there are certain habits that cannot be endured, so you need to get rid of them before tying the knot with another person. Learn how to relate with your in-laws, though you are getting married to your spouse, remember he or she didn’t fall from the sky, the person came from a family and that family shouldn’t be neglected.

Be wise, invest the same amount of energy and efforts you put in preparation for the event into the journey also.

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